See You Soon…

My daughter is five next week, so quite possibly what I’m doing today is long overdue, but it really doesn’t make me feel any easier or happier about it. I am leaving my children overnight for the first time! I don’t know why I feel so bad about it, but I honestly think I’m going to spend my entire train journey bawling my eyes out like an over emotional loon! We’ve had nights apart before after all, both of them have been to sleepovers at their friend’s houses and I used to leave them all day, which is surely more obvious to them owing to the fact that they’re awake!

I just feel that this is a real milestone, because up until now, any nights we have spent apart have been for them, and they’ve done the ‘going away.’ This time, I will be putting them to bed, and when they wake up I won’t be there, and I won’t be back in time to put them to bed either, so it will be the first complete day of their lives I won’t see them for. Most of you probably think I’m weird for feeling like this, it’s only a day after all. Some people are probably very jealous that I’m going to have a whole day of hot tea and unaccompanied wees, but I’m dreading it!

Since giving up my job last year, I spend so much time with the children it’s like they’re part of me, and I just don’t feel quite right without them. A few hours is lush of course but I’m going to miss them so much.

I know the children will be absolutely fine, and they don’t feel the same as me, in fact they can’t wait to have a play date before school so that my husband can get to work on time, and having Daddy pick them up from school and pre school is the ultimate treat! This is the thing, my husband is still here, it’s not even like we’re both leaving them! I just somehow feel like I shouldn’t be going, even though it’s for work and I’ll only be gone 24 hours!

So come on Mums who’ve done it already, how can I stop myself from bawling my eyes out on the train tonight, my eyes are filling up just thinking about it?! Am I freak who just needs to sort myself out, or is this just a normal Mum thing?!


2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. TheBoyandMe
    Apr 23, 2012 @ 20:11:13

    (I thought you’d given work up?)

    Just manage an hour at a time, that’s the best advice I can give lovely.


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